.
Why is it if say extended rearfacing is mentioned and a mom doesn't want to hear about it, we get told, "There are different parenting styles". Um, I call BULLSHIT...wanting your kid safe is not a parenting "STYLE". Rearfacing IS safer. That is FACT not mere opinion. All you have to do is research it to find out, but, these "other style" of moms can't be arsed to bother. They would rather call everyone else a "crazy, AP, over protective mom". Uh huh...fine, I guess I will accept that title if it means my kid is fucking safer. Ok then, that's me, "crazy, AP over-protective mom". Whatever.
Parenting styles that differ are those that hover their child when they are climbing on the jungle gym and those that don't. Those are parenting styles..things that wouldn't really matter wither way. Not choosing to do something potentially dangerous or not dangerous.
Using CIO or not using CIO...ok, if there wasn't studies out that PROVE that a baby all alone in a room crying for hours until they give out and pass out was bad for their brains, then this could be called different parenting styles...but, since it can't. Don't tell me that allowing your under 2 month old to cry for even 30 minutes with you nowhere in sight is just your way of parenting. Again, I call bullshit. You just can't be arsed to parent at night. Oh and I am not talking about those that took care of baby's needs, that are actively involved. I am referring to the, "I need sleep. Let baby cry...he will fall asleep." folks.
If you put cereal in the baby bottle to "help them sleep", or you prop the bottle up "so you can do stuff". That is NOT just a different parenting style than me. Again...I call BULLSHIT!! Cereal in a bottle is wrong. There ARE warnings against it because it is a choking hazard and if your kid can't eat it off a spoon, they aren't ready for solids. Again...all FACT. You just don't care to learn and don't want to care. You can't be arsed to research and learn and care. And don't give me the, "my baby has reflux" spiel. Did you know that the cereal in a bottle remedy is an OLD outdated one? Yeah...feed baby smaller amounts frequently instead of massive bottles and reflux can generally be helped. Try it.
I know...I haven't been in your shoes..blah, blah, blah.
Nope... he slept with me, I fed bottles by HOLDING him, even at night. Every 4 hours. Well, that was after the first month where I nurse 2 straight hours. Stopped for 30 minutes then he nursed another 2 hours. Yeah...24/7.
He would drink a bottle every 4 hours, he slept all night long from 3 months because he knew I was there and would happily get up and feed him. There was no cereal in his bottle ever either.
Now, is that to say I am perfect and I never did anything wrong. NOPE...
I did plenty wrong. I turned him forward facing at 6 months. BUT, that was before there was even a 1 and 20 law or internet or extended rearfacing researched here in the US. The law was 20lbs at the time and I turned him, but, I did use a 5-point harness and I did keep him in a seat longer than everyone else.
My next kid...will be rearfaced until the max of his seat, will sleep with me and NEVER CIO, and won't have a bottle at all if I can help it. Why? Because I am adult enough to research, to see where I went wrong and try better. To acknowledge that my way was wrong and there are better ways. I have the ability to research and change and understand and not be caught up in my pride.
The thing is...I WILL continue to try and educate those that care to know about these things and you can continue to ignore it. BUT don't you dare try to excuse your unwillingness as merely a different parenting style. Tell it like it is, you just don't care to know better and I will still be here when you do decide to care.
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Thank you for this post. I am a dedicated mother and feel your pain as I am constantly chastised for being a proactive dedicated mom.
ReplyDeleteToo many people think of their children as play toys, trophy's or show pony's. They parade them around all dressed up in front of friends/ family and then once home they ignore them.
I am the crazy lady who will honk and flash er lights and roll her window down at a stop sign or stop light and tell you that you left the handle up on your child's rear facing car seat. I am also the same mom that follows the law regarding the REQUIRED USE of a Safety seat/booster, that says a child must be a certain age AND a certain weight AND a certain height. It is not one of these it is ALL THREE.
These scheduled C sections and inductions are not good parenting that is fitting a miracle into your schedule regardless of the consequences. These moms who live on coffee, cold meds, artifical sweeteners, and chcocolate while pregnant should be ashamed. Yes it is your body, but it is not JUST YOUR BODY. It is a developing child. Why would you not give them the very best opportunity to have a fully healthy formed body? I don't care if the doctor says it is ok to have a glass of wine a day if you wouldn't hand the food to your child in a bottle/ at the dinner table/ at birth you shouldn't be ingesting it while the child is developing inside of you.Call me crazy but I hold that responsibility over my own desires.
That is what parenting is. Time to grow up people and once again thank you for this post!