Today's society has their parenting all sorts of backwards...
First, you have this new baby. A baby that is in all sense of the word: Helpless. They cannot get fed, go potty, change clothes, change positions...can't do ANYTHING without your help. They have a teeny, tiny stomach that needs tiny amounts of food VERY often. They have no clue about time, about wake and sleep cycles, about feelings or anything else. The most they know is that nursing is awesome, mom cuddles are great and that if something isn't right, crying is their only option to get someone to fix what they cannot.
Knowing all of this, parents still think it is A-Ok, to feed a humongous bottle of formula and expect baby to be satisfied for 4+ hours and not cry or be hungry, they expect baby to sleep ALL night long (meaning 12+ hours) and not cry, If they don't comply..then baby is expected to "learn" how to be happy laying in the dark all alone for those 12 hours and not to make a peep or expect mom to fix a thing because she needs her sleep and this tiny baby that doesn't really understand a thing is expected to just do this without a fuss. Baby is taught from birth to use the bathroom in their diaper and then magically at 18 month or 24 months, they should just automatically use the toilet with no accidents and within a day. They have been given a bottle or breast or pacifier since birth and again, are expected to simply give it up because the parent or society decided that 12 months or sooner it should be gone. The kid again is expected to just drop it immediately. Room-sharing or bed sharing is done for hot minute and expected to be dropped on demand at some other arbitrary age. The kid is expected to play alone and not whine, to not touch anything that is within their reach. And so on and so forth....
These kids are expected to grow up and mature and do SO much before they are even emotionally or physically ready. As tiny babies it is thrust upon them. Then, around school age, maybe sooner...the switch happens.
Suddenly, these same kids that were forced and thrust into independence and maturity are treated like invalids. No, you cannot play with that or watch that or go on that playground equipment. No, you cannot be in the yard alone for five seconds. No, you cannot go over to a friends house to play unless I am hovering over you. No, you cannot touch this or do that or think that.
I seriously read a story recently about a 12 year old that was home alone when the house was robbed and he called 911 and all was ok. There were SO many comments bad mouthing the mom for leaving him alone and comments asking about calls to CPS. For a TWELVE YEAR OLD! These are the same people that claim my 17 year old shouldn't be left home alone or allowed to go to a friends house, or to be outside alone. SEVENTEEN...
No I have to ask...when did we get so twisted around? How is it that people believe a TINY BABY can "self-soothe" and should be fine alone all night for 12 hours without a peep and no food or changing, and yet also believe that a person cannot be trusted with themselves until after 18?
This perception needs to change and be flipped...seriously.
